Larissa Schot

Hey guys.

So let’s talk about dating. I’ve only had one boyfriend; I was 18. I was young and dumb but in love. Despite our two-year relationship being long distance, I will never forget how well he treated me and how he pointed out all my good qualities. Fast-forwarding to the present day I have to admit dating sucks. Whether it’s in NYC, LA, or Houston, it doesn’t matter. It’s tough. I feel like people nowadays do not value or care about relationships as much. As a single young woman, it has been challenging to meet someone with the same outlook on dating. I am a huge believer in love and, although I aspire to be an independent boss ass bitch, I would love to find a partner in life. Someone by my side to go through life with, gassing me up, and motivating me to be my best self.

As someone who travels and moves around a lot, I’ve learned how hard it is to meet people, especially people that I could have an intimate connection with. For as long as I can remember, my taste in guys has not been the best. Don’t get me wrong, there have been a handful of nice men out there, but I don’t see any of them as more than just great guy friends (which oddly enough has me now believing that men are better as friends). I am very cautious when I meet men and feel that I am only becoming more and more cautious as time goes on. For example, before a guy even comes up to me at a bar, coffee shop, etc. I already have the mindset that they are going to be a player. Am I the only one who thinks this way and prejudges their intentions?

I am not the type of girl to hook up with guys, and I feel like social media and dating apps have altered the way we “date” and interact socially. Both men and women can swipe through deciding yes or no on who they want to meet — making it easy for them to find someone new whenever they’re bored. There are literally men & women at our fingertips on the other side of our screen. So much communicating is done through a screen it feels like people aren’t even comfortable socializing or talking face to face during group outings anymore.

Whenever I’m seeing a guy, I am 100 percent myself and vulnerable. I express my feelings and don’t play any games. Many people today love playing games and think it’s what they have to do to keep it interesting. But I’m so over that and prefer everyone to be straight up and honest. When speaking to both men and women about dating everyone expresses how hard it is, but I feel like if people were honest with each other, and weren’t always looking for that “better” man or woman, dating would be less complicated.

The grass is not always greener on the other side so instead of always looking for the bigger better deal, wouldn’t it be cool if we invested our time in the person in front of us? Who knows, you could already have it but not even know because you were too busy looking for a hotter or cooler person instead of whole-heartedly trying with the one you’re with.

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